is about father - child connection
Father’s day is fast approaching and the internet is exploding with gift ideas: socks (my personal favorite), perfume, shirts, and maybe, more socks!!?
Why is it so hard to get a gift for our fathers? Do we, as fathers, even know what we want? I know for sure that it is NOT more socks.
This leads me to an important question of what I truly want on this special day...
What about a heart-to-heart connection with my son? How can I ask for that as a gift? They sure do not sell it on the internet. A connection is something you cannot force, demand, buy or trick anyone into.
I have always found it hard to create a balance between time spent on responsibilities and work, versus time to play and discover what makes my son unique. We cannot take for granted the relationships with our kids. This special connection needs work and time to flourish. When my son was little, he always wanted mommy. This dynamic created a gap that over time, I felt I needed to bridge. Then as he grew up, our “manly” interactions were mostly about competition and confrontation. I would play the bad cop most of the time. In the meantime, it seemed effortless for my wife to sit down and talk to him heart to heart. I wanted more of that, and I still do.
What I crave the most is a special relationship with my son beyond responsibilities and all the father’s “musts.”. For this father’s day, I do not need a gift but a renewal of our bond. It is about the playtime that we create together, and the connection we can build for right now and beyond.
So our idea for June and Father’s Day is to give the keys to our kids and ask them how they want to spend the day. Remember that time is never on your side, life can throw unexpected twists. So, let’s take every opportunity to laugh and play together.
I asked Keoni what he wanted to do with me on Father’s Day. He has become a passionate skateboarder and lover of all boards you can ride (surfboard, snowboard, etc…). He wants to share a magical moment in the waves with me (either a surfing day, jet ski trip, or other.) I have never surfed before or liked skateboarding. I will most likely have many falls, but for my son, I embrace the challenge and want to focus on his love, watch him try and fail, try again and finally succeed all the while smiling. And once we are done with our day of fun, I hope we will be able to connect deeper, talk about our hopes and dreams, and share a hug. I hope that on this day, I can be a kid again. I hope I can learn something new from this amazing teacher, whose proud father I happen to be.
I wish you all a Happy Father’s Day.
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